Web Fed News Yearbooks - August 1998

ONCE UPON A TIME…

Once upon a time, a beautiful, independent, self assured Duchess happened upon a frog in a pond, while she was walking on Trout.

The frog said to the Duchess, 'I was once a handsome Duke until an evil witch put a spell on me. One kiss from you and I will turn back into a Duke and then we can marry, move into the castle with my mom and you can prepare my meals, clean my clothes, bear my children and forever feel happy doing so'.

That night, while the Duchess dined on frog legs, she kept laughing and saying, 'I don't think so.'

FED LIMERICK

When a hauling a ship full of mazers
It's best to have plenty o' phasors
Cuz you never know
When Monty'll show
And blow you to hell with his Lasers!

QUOTES OF THE MONTH

Your comm unit relays a message from Lucas, "You know what's worse? the placement of the Meteoric Yungian Automatic Sigma Shield (MYASS)".
Your comm unit relays a message from Lucas, "I got MYASS shot off in the last battle".

Your comm unit relays a message from Cymbelyne, "We got roaches, Anz."
Your comm unit relays a message from Shanana, "Tbar's a roach? I always wondered about that. :)".

Your comm unit relays a message from Adamseagle, "So Susan...what ya doing?;)".
Your comm unit relays a message from Susan, "Bursting bubbles, killing dreams...making a general nuisance of myself...you?".

"Kai... I have a serious question... can I ask it?", Andy asks.
"fire away Andy", says Kaipanther.
Andy says, "Is... is your tail a bisexual"

Your comm unit relays a message from Pianoman, "come to grand to support a half-drunk Baron".
Your comm unit relays a message from Kurn, " only half drunk? naw..".

"Just wait. Fed'll probably crash in the next few minutes, I signed on.", says Danny.

"I will not let my dress size determine my self-worth...", says Bartholomew.
Bartholomew says, "I have my mothers thighs...I have to accept that..."

Danny says, "Oh, GM hunting. As good a time as drowning in a septic tank..."

Antonia asks, "anything going on tonight?"
"Dead nothing.", says Danny.
"So dead you could stick a fork in it....", says Nyota

Your comm unit relays a message from Evilzoot, "The quest for the Holy Grail is open on AAARGH if anyone cares."
>xt Evilzoot-isn't that the one you dded doing during that interview by the Fed news?
There is a brief hum from your communicator.
Your comm unit relays a message from Evilzoot, "Oh fine, bring that up Kurn :)".

>xt rumor has it that the unicorn used in that experiment now wears a croc tooth necklace and crocskin boots
Your comm unit relays a message from Rumor, "I don't have a unicorn...".

Your comm unit relays a message from Mysterion, "Is it true that you Dikes and Duchesses have a pact never to appear at the same time?".
Your comm unit relays a message from Unicorn, "I can't speak for the Dikes, but the Duchesses don't have one that I know of".
Your comm unit relays a message from Mysterion, "ACK!!!!".
Your comm unit relays a message from Mysterion, "THat's DUKES".

Your comm unit relays a message from Bigsexy, "You know its funny how you forget that you ride in a harrier..".
Your comm unit relays a message from Gracey, "You were expecting to run along side the Harrier???".

Your comm unit relays a message from Sanstrom, "Is there a help file for the "Snark Puzzle"?".

Your comm unit relays a message from Dalman, "I have a clue. I just have no idea what to do with it.".

Your comm unit relays a message from Offwhitebeard, "Arrr, twas 2 leagues under I was, when Davey Jones came to me and I said: Listen Davy, youre gonna take this earrin and wear it. Its a clip on and it looks nice on ya, goes nice with your hat. And thats when I RAMMED A marlin up his nose".

Your comm unit relays a message from Kurn, "your so stupid ya got stabbed in a shootout..".
Your comm unit relays a message from Mootdroid, "LMAO!!!".
Your comm unit relays a message from Day, "lmao???".
Your comm unit relays a message from Kurn, "Laughing My attic Out?".

Your comm unit relays a message from Countc, "trying to figure out how to make my ex work better:)".
Your comm unit relays a message from Countc, "Any hints?;)".
Your comm unit relays a message from Dontpanic, "ignore it ;) works for me".

MOODS OF THE MONTH

Wavin a feeler at ya, Cockroach has just arrived.

Sick of repairing his facilities Magesmiley is here.

Horsell, Dogsell, Pigsell, Warnrg is here.

Duke Puzzle AND Bust!! Even Provostfunk is here.

FORGET HUGGING: STRANGLING a TREE, Bandle has just moved west.

hanging on for dear life Tschu is here.

Monty's entrails on his boots, Goldenratt has just moved northeast.

A faint memory from the past Pajamian is here.

here is a funny mood: Please dont drink a Bloodymary is here

Longing to use DIGEST again Pajamian has just gone north.

CLOTHES OF THE MONTH

examine wolfyn
She is wearing a shirt that says, "I went to Horsell and all I got was this damned T-Shirt."

DRINK OF THE MONTH

Lagkiller has bought you a fluffy Foam lagless drink that burns on its way down, but makes you feel better!!