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WEB FED NEWS YEARBOOKS Earthdate November 2003 |
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WEB FED NEWS YEARBOOKS Earthdate November 2003 |
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INSIDE SCOOP |
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What was in November 2003's Inside Scoop:
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CORRECTION TO ARTICLE ABOUT TIME WARPS After the article written by this newsdroid regarding the effect of timewarping on inhabitants of the past was printed (see http://chezdiesel/archives/fed/webyearbooks/2003/wyb0310b.html), I was visited by a few of the Galactic Administration's "negotiators", in the company of the Minister For Right-Thinking Propoganda, Flarz Kninkomp Oop. After a few hours of being dismantled and shown how many different ways a droid may be re-built, I was told to publish the 'truth' about the matter. Having developed a distinct preference for my original design, I present the following 'corrections':
This newsdroid acknowledges that it was in error, and further understands that as a mere machine, it is very prone to error. The Empire is beneficent to all it's citizens, and the Galactic dministration is merciful, and concerned with the care of all its subjects... <looks over shoulder - was that all correct, then?>
THE
BUZZ Chaos hit the multiverse this week. Why? Well…
Mountains crumbled, toilets flushed the wrong way, and what's right became what's wrong. Things are slowly being turned around, but if you find yourself going the wrong way, blame it on Greyspacewolf! Congratulations are in order for the coupling of Charan and Fortun. May you both find happiness for the remainder of your fedlives. The ladies of DataSpace have been in an uproar ever since the return of the Devilish one. While he continues to fedwed every one of the female species in the multiverse, it seems his current one and only is fed up with his antics.
~*~ Until next week, make DataSpace your playground. I'm always watching!
REMINISCENCES As I have slowly re-entered Fed, and made my way up the ranks, I have been taking note of the things that are different. When I made Squire and brought Gor online, something happened that was – to me – very odd: I began being solicited, by prospective Dukes and Duchesses, to become a member of their respective Duchies! There was, in particular, one question I was constantly being asked: "Why are you still in Sol?" My initial response was, "Because I haven't found a Duchy that was willing to take me." I very quickly learned to amend that response, however... I have also noted that it apparently has become the Galactic Federation Pastime, to constantly reminisce about the ‘old days', and how it was, way back when. Well, being the good Fed citizen that I am, this new state of affairs provoked some thoughts, of my own... (Yes, Sherman... set the Way-Back Machine to long, long ago...) Federation, back then, was booming. When it became "Free Fed" on AOL, seeing 600-700 players online at any given time was as common as black market replacement parts in a newsdroid. There were certainly enough Poor People that the higher ranks still viewed themselves as elitists to the lower ranks. People rarely gave away the solution to puzzles. It was practically a necessary survival tactic. I remember, with particular humor, the lines that would form in a certain room, on Titan, in an effort to ‘get acid'... and the extremes that those in queue would go to, to police themselves. (Not to mention the ire at the occasional person that had timed the ticks, and would pop a moment or two before it reset, and ‘macro-grab' it. ~whistles innocently~) At any rate, another effect of this was that there were damned few Dukes and Duchesses around, back then. Planet Owners stayed on waiting lists, to get into duchies – sometimes for months. Indeed, doing a "c pri <anything> sol" got to be tantamount to doing a "di duchies" today... an invitation for spam to knock you out of your seat – and became a gold mine, for traders who could make their entire livings solely in Sol (Note to Self: subject for another article). So here we are, back in the present, and now I find myself in the (formerly) enviable position of being able to essentially pick and choose which duchy I will join. How should I – or any other new Squire, for that matter – choose? I suppose that will depend on what I, or any other Squire, wishes to get out of the game. If I am a party animal, interested mainly in the social interaction that Fed offers, I may go to a duchy whose owner specializes in social events. If I like the economic mechanics of the game, perhaps I will choose a duchy filled with active haulers and traders... who knows? One thing is readily apparent, and that is that now, more than ever, a player may define Himself/Herself/Itself by the group they choose to associate with. I think it would be an interesting study to observe each duchy, and its members, and see if indeed they are more like ‘birds of a feather'... ...but then again... maybe I am reading too much, into a simple, text-based, roleplaying game.... until next time, then.... (Starts down the duchy list... "Backdraft?"... flips a coin...)
THE
BUZZ Fleas have begun picketing Caddo this week, as they have been unable to come to terms with Wolfyn on arrangements for their health and retirement plans! This recent strike sends the flea business into turmoil, leaving much of the galaxy flealess... Can we survive this drought? Inside source tells me that the fleas and representatives from Caddo are to conduct secret talks later today. Today! In Concert, Pink Floyd comes to the Selena Space Port to play their new song, "Fed my Dolphin." This reporter has heard that it is the precursor to the dolphins evacuating earth and soon after the total destruction of the Tourist as we know him. That will be good news for all the bruised ankles because of that blasted mallet! A new support group has found its way into the Multiverse. WBA (Workthingy Beaters Anonymous) is making huge strides forward in its charter meetings. As people come to grips with their problems, all Workthingies are breathing a huge sigh of relief.
Remember, understanding you have a problem or addiction is the first step! The moon collided today with a nearby captain, crushing the poor thing instantly. He was survived by his lowly clone, who promptly walked into a weeble, and never wobbled away! Dire prediction of the day:
In other news, a duke recently stumbled into Slarti's, tripped on the sandwich, and accidentally opened a time-rift in the link-orbit space surrounding his duchy... This rift immediately swallowed 90% of the planets in Fed, leaving it... much the same as it was… Senator Bonfort FINALLY arrived at his destination to meet the delegation from Mars. Unfortunately a randomly porting Duchess landed on the delegates, crushing them instantly, and rendering them unable to save Earth and Mars from a civil war....Oh well! ~*~ Until next week, make DataSpace your playground. I'm always watching!
By Tarlcabot In a surprise move today, a delegation of stevedores petitioned the Galactic Administration for formal guild status. Clarence Snibblebrock, chief of the delegation and spokesman for the stevedores, cited that stevedores throughout the known galaxy have been ‘collecting' commodities from traders, since the Galactic Empire was originally founded. It is apparently the contention of the prospective guild, that they are an important part of the galactic economy, as they create the need for continued trading of commodities. Snibblebrock stoutly denies that the stevedores have lately been using strong-arm tactics to force traders into signing the petition calling for the formation of the guild, in spite of massive complaints from traders that they not only have had commodities stolen, but credits, as well. The Imperial law requires a petition with 17 billion signatures as a first step in the formation of any formally recognized guild. With the petition of the stevedores now submitted, it is expected that the Galactic Administration will formally recognize the submission sometime late next year.
THE
BUZZ Someone in Fed may have a split personality:
Beware the howling!! It seems that the WoLfPaCk Duke has found a loop in the system, literally. The secret unearthed by his incessant diggings has somehow allowed him to hook up more than 20 planets to the Wolfy link. When pressed about this discovery, the Duke smiled seductively and said that he needed more room for his pack... especially the shewolves. Looking at him in utter amazement, his cryptic meaning became quite clear.
Beware ladies of all species. Even we bots have a heard time resisting this particular temptation!!
A shortage of Dukes? Yes, apparently that's what the most recent DataSpace census is saying. It seems that the women in the multiverse are far outweighing the men. While this might be a good thing for the overall economy, lack of wars and other such things, it's creating quite a run on dates to the social events of the season. Almost any male can be seen with two or more beauties on his arm. It's a good thing that women can get along so well! Otherwise chaos would surely reign. But don't get too comfortable in your numbers, gentlemen. As the numbers of you dwindle, the women are discovering what we've known all along... Men? Who needs them?? ~*~ Until next week, make DataSpace your playground. I'm always watching!
DEAR
BUBBA Dear Bubba, Signed, Dear Hater, Signed, Dear Bubba, Signed, Dear Perplexed, Signed,
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