ALTERNATIVE LIFESTYLESEpisode 2Zeptember: Welcome to another episode of Alternative Lifestyles, where we examine the issues faced by Federation II alts. I am your host, Zeptember. Today we have with us some members of a rather large alt family, the House of Doz. With us are Zardoz, Zodraz, Thundarr, and Ookla. Zardoz, thank you, and welcome. Zardoz: Thank you Zeptember. It is an honor to be here. Zeptember: Zardoz, in our last show, you said that several members of your family were having a disagreement, and wouldn't attend. We invited you back here today to explore this issue and see how a modern alt family resolves internal disagreements. Zardoz: Yes, well it took some doing but we were able to get... uhhh...... Zodraz (whispering): Thundarr and Ookla. Zardoz: Oh of course, yes, we were able to get Thundarr and Ookla to attend today's show. Zeptember: Now I understand that Thundarr and Ookla are having a disagreement. Thundarr, would you care to comment on what seems to be the problem? Thundarr: Me no understand Ookla since him come back from boarding school. Him always making me look like big dummy. Zodraz: That would be hard to do. Zardoz: Zod... Zeptember: Interesting. Ookla, would you care to comment? Ookla: Arraaoking arregggggn uurrrrrhhhggg! Zeptember: What is he saying? Zardoz: I think he's saying he's glad to be here Zodraz: Sure, that sounds real close. Thundarr: Him not say that. Zeptember: Ookla could you comment again? Ookla: Aaiirrrgggg aaarrnnttt eeeeatttthhh! Zardoz: Oh of course, he's saying how wonderful his day has been. Zodraz: Oh, of course. That's so obvious. Thundarr: Him not say that. Zeptember: Ookla, again please? Ookla: Herrrrnnnggg aarrrnnggg Thundarr: For love of God!!! Him say, "I choking on pastry from Green Room!!" (Gets up and runs to Ookla and performs Heimlich maneuver). Ookla: (Takes big breath) Thank you old chap. That certainly was a most sticky wicket. Thundy old bean, I'm forever in your debt. Thundarr: What he say? Zodraz: He said you're a big dummy. Zardoz: Zod! Zeptember: Well that's it for time. Join us again on Alternative Lifestyles where we will examine how an alt family copes with a new addition. From all of us at Alternative Lifestyles, thank you, and good night. |