**>> SPYNET BULLETIN **>> EARTHDATE 95.12.24 **>> AN H-by-A SERVICE **>> Compiled by Hazed plus a team of specialist newsdroids **>> your news and gossip and get paid good groats! **>> COMPLIMENTS OF THE SEASON! We'd like to take this opportunity to wish you all very happy holidays from the Fed Team: Bella, Hazed, Clem, Pegasus, Freya, and all the Game Hosts. Santa will continue to pop into Fed from time to time delivering his annual good cheer, and there will be a party on New Year's Eve as we see out the old year and welcome in the new throughout the night, taking in all the Galaxy's time zones! Enjoy the fun. And don't forget Grannie's Christmas Pub Crawl tonight at 9.00pm eastern. How many planets have put Christmas trees in their bars? Find out in the Galactic Barhop, and see how much egg nog, rum punch and other seasonal ethanol you can consume. **>> UPDATE ON NEW STUFF Last week's news told you all about the new code to let Explorers build their links, but left a question-mark over the existence (or not) of mini-planets. In the event, mini-planets did not make it into the game because the TechDroid ran out of time. They will go in after the holiday season. **>> LIMITS ON SOCIAL SECURITY There is now a cap on social security - you can only invest 10 points at a time. If you have more points invested than you need to take you to the maximum population for your planet, you get workthings up to the maximum but get charged for all the investment. On subsequent days, if the investment is still there and the population is still at maximum, the investment will be reduced by 1 point (still being charged for, of course!). As well as stopping you from boosting your social security to silly levels, this gives you a way to reduce social security investment without causing disaffection, although it isn't exactly a cheap way! **>> ADVANCE WARNING: NEGATIVE REWARDS When the TechDroid gets back to work in the new year, it is going to make a change that affects planet-owners who put negative rewards on their mobiles. When the new code goes in, negative rewards will be charged to the planet at the time they are placed. So you may want to take a look at your mobiles and maybe lower their negative rewards... **>> INTO THE DARKNESS The dark night of the soul calls ever more to the heart of Instill. This abyss in his heart draws him ever deeper as he insists that there is no hope for him. He claims that only death can return him to his beloved. In hopes of death, Instill boldly challenges the strongest fighters to duels on no grounds except that it should aid in his goal. Last seen, this warmonger was approaching Sting. Sting patiently explained to this suicidal man that fighting just isn't his cup of tea (with a spot of milk, please.) Not happy with offering battles to just those who frequent the spacelanes, Instill targeted Porcupine whilst she played darts (while sneezing) in CD's. Porcupine laughed and said it would take a lot to drag her from the bar. After all, she claimed, it does stock Dung Beetle Berry Ripple Ice Cream! Still not satisfied with this, Instill insisted that Porcupine was acting strangely and dared to confront her on this. He immediately tailed it over to the bar and, staring her face to face in person, tight beamed her to ask why she acted so strangely. Porcupine would have none of this and told the fighter that she did not care to communicate with her tightbeam transmitter. "Too much like work pressing these funny little buttons to communicate," she stated when asked why. Instill turned on his heels and stomped off. He did return after collecting his wits to attempt to confront her a second time. He asked, "Why do you act so strangely in front of me?" "Do you think it's really just you?!" she responded incredulously. After agreeing, Instill left to find yet another person to engage in a contest of arms. To no avail. No one seems to want to battle against this man. It was heard that Instill believes himself to be following in Tellurian's footsteps. Does this mean that Instill fights only with macros that sweep through Sol Space? Newsdroids were unable to obtain an answer to that question, for no one would fight Instill. Try not asking for a fight, Instill, and provoke one! **>> VOIDING CONTRACTS There is always serious negative actions when contracts are voided. Tempers will flare, lives will be threatened, and commanders will find they have to work just a bit harder due to lack of contractors. But what about marriage contracts? This was a concern of Drspock's and he was determined to get to the bottom of just why Mosquito and Wildstar felt it necessary to get married. Again! When the groom entered the galaxy, Drspock immediately asked why. Wildstar replied that he had died. Newsdroids were shocked! There has been no news of Wildstar's death (well, recently). Perhaps it was during the news strike, or when droids found themselves heaped in a pile on Castillo. Whatever the case, Wildstar was a Baron and there was no way he could have died recently and worked up to such a respected level. Drspock speculated on many theories until he came up with the solution. "All contracts are NULL and VOID with each new version of Federation Dataspace!" This revelation shocked the galaxy! Denizens are warned to watch version numbers when entering the spacefield in case they find themselves living out of wedlock! Droids are happy to point out that Budwarp and Dierdre have done so for quite a long time! Such scandal! **>> WHAT A DRAGOON! These are the Dragoon members to date: Merchant Apocalypse Journeyman Jordan Journeyman Admiral This group is seen now as the farce of the galaxy! First they were set up to crush Daphne's reputation, then Admiral apologized. Next it was seen that they were fighting against Chaos, then the strategies changed. NOW they are seen making plans to attack Cove's Head Quarters! Make up your minds on where your allegiance is! **>> COMMERCIAL BREAK This is a paid announcement and may solicit funds. Brought to you by Jordan, this advertisement could be true. Friends, are you afraid that you're dating your sister? Do you suspect you have more in common with your lover than just a mutual attraction? If so, then you may want to order a copy of 'Jordan's Guide to FedRelations!' Yes, for only $24.95 you can get a comprehensive scratch n sniff guide to who is related to who. This book is guaranteed 100% accurate, except for the parts that are wrong. Now back to our regularly scheduled fabrications. **>> FAILED TO BE MENTIONED There is some sort of group out there that consists of one member, ten megs donated by him, and seeks groats, members, and a base of operations. We don't know what this group is, and it doesn't seem to be recognized by anyone else. There are no goals in this group. No tasks. No assignments. No date for meeting. If you feel like being apart of something without actually doing anything, you may want to consider this group as an option. But be prepared to pay a megs to make a few groats! **>> CARNAGE ON TISNAR The death toll mounts on Tisnar as unsuspecting Fedders blunder out of the hospital into Kainaw's death-trap and find themselves unexpectedly and tragically dead-dead. So far, this deadly planet has claimed a Captain, three Merchants, a JourneyPerson and even a Thane! Word is now out that the planet is to be avoided, despite the tempting and high paying contracts that appear on the Transportation Central workboard from time to time. The clamor grows for the Galactic Administration to DO SOMETHING to make the Galaxy safe again for traders. It is clear that the habit of most POs of putting their insurance office in the same location as the hospital has made players complacent and lazy. With no insurance, faced with a choice of several different exits, and a warning that safety lies only down one of them, players are not stopping to think but just wandering through the first available door. Indeed, they seem to be completely ignoring the warning beacon at the Interstellar Link indicating that this planet might not be the safest place in the Galaxy! The correct response when the safe exit from a hospital is not immediately apparent is to sell your ship and off-planet to safety. Well, the really correct response is to heed the warning beacon and not visit the planet in the first place! Mind you, Kainaw still has a long way to go to reach the death toll extracted by the legendary planet Bree. Ah, memories... **>> UNDERROO SANS HOOLIGANS RUNNING AMUCK? The newsdroid staff has no choice but to shake their collective heads and wonder what Federation DataSpace has come to when Dierdre, Duchess Consort of Duke Budwarp, reported that a certain, well, one hesitates to use the word gentleman, since the unnamed personage in question was without ANY sort of clothing when he barged uninvited into the parlor of Dierdre. The Duke was strangely absent at the time, but fortunately Jordan, Greybeard, and Briefcase were present and came to Dierdre's aid, tossing the nude intruder over the doorstep. The Duchess Consort was understandably traumatized by the event, but composed herself enough to report the incident. She said that she had no idea at all of his intentions, but that she wanted the event reported to warn the Fed populace in general and other gentle young women from being accosted in such a shocking manner. When asked if the intruder had been obviously intoxicated or had been suffering from delusions of dragoonhood, she replied 'That could be. I know Admiral has been selling those dragoon underoos. It could have influenced him'. With that the Duchess Consort's personal physician removed the asst newsdroid from Dierdre's presence, indicating that the Duchess Consort was suffering from extreme exhaustion and trauma, but rest assured the newsdroid team will not rest till we bring this unclothed intruder to... er... light? **>> IS NO ONE SAFE? Not even our beloved bringer of goodies, that jolly old elf himself? You may well ask yourselves WHAT kind of twisted grinch would kidnap Santa, especially before we all get our presents, and the newsdroid staff wants to assure Santa, if indeed he is reading this, that we have all been VERY, VERY good indeed. Assorted Federation personages began to worry when the jolly old elf had not been seen for several hours, quite unlike his normal habits. Just as a search party was about to be organized, Santa materialized in a shimmer of teleportation. Although Santa wanted to avoid panic, he did report that he had been kidnapped by unknown sources and stripped of his teleporter, and been interrogated as to the whereabouts of his sleigh, reindeer and secret toy factory. Well, Santa bravely resisted his interrogators and when the masked fiends stepped outside for a moment, he managed to get a homing signal sent to his reindeer. In a flash, the team was harnessed to the mammoth class sleigh and jumping through interstellar links at record speed to the rescue of kidnapped Santa. The kidnappers however vanished at the sight of the battle- armored reindeer pulling the twin-lasered Goliath of a sleigh, but rumors are already flying and several of the factions have offered Santa sanctuary on their worlds or troops to defend the precious cargo of the sleigh. Santa, however, seeming none the worse for wear and with a new teleporter already manufactured at his factory, turned down all the offers. Standing beside his sleigh, he patted one of the twin lasers, replying with a wink that he was going to make sure that all the good little Fedders got all their presents right on schedule and that everyone else got exactly what they deserved. **>> SPYNET REVIEW Alas poor Captain Eregor, Merchant Detros, Merchant Arwen, Merchant Apocalypse, JP Pooh and Then Byterunner - all fell foul of the dread planet Tisnar. We also lost Adventurer Rdget who snuffed it in Musica. RIP, everyone. Congratulations to everyone who was promoted over the past two weeks. The new Captains were Delilah, Rdget, Detros (back from the dead), Boz, Eclipse, Psyche, Michelle, Apocalypse (back from the deadO, Dnacowboy, Novice, Tofer, Chester and Ste. Adlyr, Tarazed, Delilah, Nocturne, Kord, Flacon, Tranish, Starre, Detros, Tofer and Apocalypse were all promoted to Adventurer. The Traders Guild accepted Detros, Rhiannon, Delilah, Tofer and Tranish into its ranks. Detros was promoted to Merchant (twice!), and so did Arwen. Fastjack and Cabal displayed their economic prowess by making JP. **>> CONTACTS The following information will appear at the end of every News Bulletin, so you don't have to read it if you already know it. The current Federation Game Hosts are: Freya, Porcupine, Lyrynna, Grannie, Sparky, Zzzax, Geezer, Magneto, Syfari and Goblin. Their function is to answer questions, help new players get started, and make fun things happen. In the event of a problem or question, you can: * talk to Hazed or one of the Game Hosts in the game * a message to Hazed * send mail on your host system to the Federation team: on GEnie, mail FEDII.2 or use the option on the main Fed page on Delphi, mail FED2 or use the option on the main Fed page on Cris, mail FEDERATION2 You can buy a copy of the very excellent Idiot's Guide to Federation for the paltry sum of $15.95. On GEnie, type ORDER from any main menu page. On Delphi and Cris, send a check for $15.95 to: Leah Parker, 4543 La Crescenta Avenue, La Crescenta, CA 91214-2912. **>> BULLETIN ENDS