**>> SPYNET BULLETIN **>> EARTHDATE 95.04.16 **>> AN H-by-A SERVICE **>> Compiled by Hazed plus a team of specialist newsdroids **>> your news and gossip and get paid good groats! **>> CHANGE TO PLANET LINKING Of all the problems the game has suffered since the move to NewFed last October, the one thing that has caused the most trouble, and the problem that's proved the most difficult to solve, has been errors in planets that slip through the planet-checker but affect the game seriously. Although we've tightened up the checker every time a new error comes to light, planet-owners seem to be endlessly inventive in finding new errors that we never thought of before! Much of the problem is caused by carelessness: people are so keen to get their planets into the game as fast as possible that they don't take the time make sure they've got them right (hence the ranting in the news last week about typos in planets). In order to stop the kind of problems we've been having recently with new planets, we're going to have to change the way planets are linked into the game. In future, planets will not be loaded automatically into the game until they've been checked by Bella. When you finish working on your new planet, use the Add option as normal, and you will be asked the usual questions: what you want to call your planet, the standard location numbers and so on. But instead of immediately making the planet ready to go into the game at the next reset, the workbench will generate an item of sendmail to Bella telling her the planet is ready. She will then check the planet and complete the linkage, assuming no problems show up. We guarantee that new planets will be checked and linked within 48 hours, sooner if possible. However, only one new planet will be put in each day, so if several people Add new planets on the same day they will be taken in order. **>> OUT WITH THE OLD... IN WITH THE NEW! Fed has two new Game Hosts: Sparky, a ball of energy, and Zzzax, Overlord of Saturn (see his latest message to the Galaxy below). Please be gentle with them as they find their feet (or equivalent) in their new roles. Gazoo has bowed out of being a Host, due to pressure of work. As always, the current Game Hosts are listed at the end of every news bulletin, and in the game Hosts are shown as such on the display. **>> EASTER FUN! Happy Easter to all our players! This weekend you can explore the planet Cabbage, written by Hazed as an example showing how to use events to achieve certain effects. It's also jolly good fun! There are only two death locations on Cabbage: one is only available to Rich People, and the other is well marked so you cannot stumble into it by mistake. We recommend Jessica's Bar (north from the landing pad) as an ideal place to relax and socialise! If you're reading this on Sunday, don't forget that Freya will be running a planet-designers school tonight at 9.00 eastern on Cabbage. **>> YOUR QUESTIONS ANSWERED A new planet-owner recently asked us a question, and rather than replying privately we thought we'd post the answer here in the news in case anyone else is confused. He, she or it asked why the tourist time on his, her or its planet gets reset every day. The answer is that every time the game is reset, the time on the clock is converted to groats which are added to your planet treasury as income from the tourist trade. The clock is reset back to zero. This is yet another good reason to make your planet a place people will want to spend time exploring! Get it right and make more groats. **>> SATURN SENATORIAL SEAT??? Could it be? Is it true? Apparently so! Zzzax, the Overlord of Saturn, was spotted in FedSpace... as a Game Host! When a newsdroid timidly asked Saturn's Overlord just what he was doing as a Game Host in FedSpace (since he's declared war on it), Zzzax gave one of his typical responses... "Ze Zaturnian Empire zhall reign zupreme!" he bellowed. "Bella haz been forced to admit our prezence after all theze yearz of znubbing, and az a rezult, I am now ze official Ambazzador to Fedzpace. We zhall zee if ze invazion will ztill be necezzary... it dependz on if ze rezpect for ze All-Mighty Zaturnian race iz rightfully reztored or not." The newzdr... er, NEWSdroid tried to give further follow-up questions, but Zzzax vaporized the hapless reporter and declared the audience to be over. **>> TELL TOLD OFF - WINDY BLOWN AWAY Tellurian and Windman duked it out in a vicious battle that raged across the Solar system last night. After an hour's binge in CD's, the two developed a mutual emotion for each other and proceeded to express it from Titan to Mercury. The battle started near Mars sometime after Windman gave Tellurian some pointed observation on a not normally mentioned anatomical member. Tellurian opened up with his twin lasers and blew out Windman's galley, destroying his entire year's supply of Taco Sauce. Windman replied in kind with a barrage of missiles across Tell's solar panels sending a power surge through his Nintendo. Tell then sailed over to Saturn with Windman in hot pursuit. Saturnine space was shortly chock full of flying missiles, burning lasers, and scattering mag rounds. Vibrating explosions shut down both the Delphi and WIU nets. Tellurian then sent mag rounds right up Windman's engine nozzle, causing Windman's ship to do short little hops around the rings of Saturn, much like a small dog with its posterior full of rock salt. Silas was busy trying to get a load of milk for the school children to Earth when Windman retaliated and opened up with his Rocket Chainsaws. Silas, who had sailed right into the line of fire, managed to escape and make it to Mars, but the school lunch block grant for the state of Alabama has been lost and the children will starve. More fire was exchanged near the moon, where China was busy trying to get her new planet on line. Ship and new planet parts were soon scattering across the lunar surface and flying at random in space. China wishes to point out that she's rather upset about that. As for Random, he ducked. Then the two forgot why they were trying to kill each other. As they were Senators, they promptly got bored, and left Fed space. As a consequence, neither member was available for comment. **>> THE FED AWARDS More nominations have been received for the First Annual Fed Awards. Kain displayed a massive ego by nominating his planet, Empyrian, for the Best Planet award. Freak agreed by also nominating Kain. However, Kain soon changed his mind and nominated Helena's Troy for that honour. Whether Helena will nominate herself, or Kain, or someone completely different, remains to be seen. **>> REJECTED! Poor Wildstar is smarting after having been turned down, in no uncertain terms, by the object of his affection. It seems he proposed to the lovely Mosquito, who only recently parted from her long-time love, Blackadder. Mosquito wasn't impressed by Wildstar's offer of marriage. We haven't asked her for her feelings on the matter, but Wildstar himself is now to be found drowning his sorrows in Fed's bars. **>> PLANETS AND DUCHIES There's another four planets in the game this week. Yes, four! They certainly are all coming in a bunch. The new worlds are Asrianna's Sine, Ukla's Snafu, Helena's Troy and Chicago's City. We review Asrianna's Sine below. Helena's Troy has been offline since it was put in, because the owner has been away; we hope we'll get a chance to look around it during the week. Chicago's City only went in yesterday, so we'll give that one a chance to settle in before reviewing it. And Ukla's Snafu is certainly not fit for review yet - apart from only having around 20 locations, it's riddled with typing and spelling mistakes that need to be sorted out (but a cursory glance showed there is probably a good planet in there waiting to get out.). Scrooge has advanced his world of Hermitage, it is now an Industrial planet. **>> SINE OF THE TIMES Someone, at least, has taken our moaning about rushed planets to heart. Asrianna's Sine is very competently done - no typos or movement errors, no notices saying "this part will be finished when I get around to it". Asrianna has taken the time to get her planet right before linking it to the game, and for that she deserved congratulations. Take note, prospective planet-owners: this is the way to do it! There's a delay when jumping to Sine, while the planet authorities sort out landing clearance; advertisers take this opportunity to bombard visitors with their sales pitches. The usual services cluster around the landing pad, although Asrianna has broken with tradition by not having her insurance office in the same location as the hospital - instead it's in the trading exchance, along with the other "shopping" functions. The hospital offers an extra service: ear excavation. Luckily droids don't suffer from waxy deposits so we passed on this one. From the landing pad, one has a choice of heading south through a range of hills, or east towards the town. The town's roads are paved with cobbles, which play hell with the wheels upon which we droids trundle! Still, it makes for a picturesque setting. Music-lovers will be drawn to Blue Lou's Blues Bar, the home of sublime sounds, and the shop opposite selling the most impressive range of guitars. We must also mention Madame Red's Therapeutic Clinic. A very fine establishment! A country fair lets visitors bask in the more rural sights and sounds (and smells!) with a livestock market, vegetable stalls, wine sellers, a gypsy fortune teller and a carousel. Sadly, our visit was curtailed not long after that. A step in the wrong direction led us to being incarcerated in an auto-locking jail cell, from whence there was no escape. Asrianna has crafted an enjoyable planet that is very well worth a visit. In addition, there's a puzzle for which she offers a 15 meg reward. She will also pay 5 meg to the person who visits the most locations without actually solving the puzzle. Presumably those with teleporters are not eligible!! **>> SPYNET REVIEW Congratulations to everyone who got promoted during the last week. The new Captains were Blargg, Agate and Phalanx. Hannah and Bond reached Adventurer/euse. The Traders Guild admitted Goddess, Snookums and Bond. Kate and Freak became Merchants. The awesome JP puzzle was easily solved by Xavier, Zolak and Patrick. Chicago cracked the fiendist GM puzzle, and then went on to become an Explorer. Asrianna, Ukla, Helena and Chicago all became Squires as their new planets were linked into the game. Scrooge is now an Industrialist, thanks to his advancing planet. Ferret managed to go dead-dead... twice! Once as a Merchant, and once as an Adventurer. Presumably in that order. Adventurer Blargg also went d-d but he's come back. **>> CONTACTS The following information will appear at the end of every News Bulletin, so you don't have to read it if you already know it. The current Federation Game Hosts are: Freya, Phoenix, Chrysalis, Lyrynna, Grannie, Sparky and Zzzax. Their function is to answer questions, help new players get started, and make fun things happen. In the event of a problem or question, you can: * talk to Hazed or one of the Game Hosts in the game * a message to Hazed * send mail on your host system to the Federation team: on GEnie, mail FEDII.2 or use the option on the main Fed page on Delphi, mail FED2 or use the option on the main Fed page on Cris, mail FEDERATION2 You can buy a copy of the very excellent Idiot's Guide to Federation for the paltry sum of $15.95. On GEnie, type ORDER from any main menu page. On Delphi and Cris, send a check for $15.95 to: Leah Parker, 4543 La Crescenta Avenue, La Crescenta, CA 91214-2912. **>> BULLETIN ENDS