**>> SPYNET BULLETIN **>> EARTHDATE 93.01.24 **>> AN H-by-A SERVICE **>> Compiled by Hazed plus a team of specialist newsdroids **>> your news and gossip and get paid good groats! **>> COMING SOON Last week we told you that Bella was doing a lot of background work on the game, changing the underlying data structures, and as a result she had many alterations planned. We've been picking her brains again (it doesn't get any less unpleasant, believe us!) and she's told us about a few more of the new things she'll be doing. She is going to make some changes to way Dukes run their duchies, so that the larger a duchy is, the more difficult it will be to control. This will mean Dukes will have to decide between having a super-duchy (like Occy's) but having problems controlling it and making groats out of it, or having a small, neat duchy that is efficiently run. As part of this, there will be a new command for Dukes: . Yes, at last, Dukes can give unwanted serfs the heave-ho, and toss their planets out on their posteriors. The planet owner won't have the 20 meg joining fee reimbursed if they are expelled! Planet owners won't be able to set up milkrun slots, or write jobs into Transportation, if the destination world has an embargo set on them. These, and the other changes listed last week, will be put into the game in a few days. **>> CONTROVERSY! PART I One of the changes Bella made last week was to allow planet owners to write jobs directly to the Transportation Central work display. Because she wanted these jobs to be seen as more important than milkrun slot jobs, she made them pay four trader points, higher than all other Transportation jobs. This has started a fierce debate in the "Suggestions" topic of the MPGames BBS. It's the usual kind of debate: Rich People saying that it is far too easy to be promoted at the lower ranks; and Poor People saying that doing jobs is boring. Bella is taking note of all the comments, and will decide whether things should stay as they are now, or be altered one way or the other, so now's your chance to have your say. Note for new players: yes, changes are often made to the game because they are requested by the players, so it is always worth letting us know if you have any ideas. Such notable features as the command and the extremely important command were pressed upon Bella by the players. We consider all suggestions for changes and new features, but obviously we cannot implement everything because we have to consider the effect on the game as a whole. **>> CONTROVERSY! PART II Also in the MPGames BBS is a raging controversy about how planet owners should run their exchanges, and in particular how Occy ran Zippy's exchange and how he encourages his serfs to behave. It's far too complicated to detail here, but it makes entertaining reading. We have promised to print the Official Zippy Policies in the news, but so far we haven't received them. We hope to bring them to you in a later edition. In the meantime, we did manage to sneak a look at Hazed's Rules and Regulations for Scratchwood Serfs. We only managed to copy out a few of the clauses before Hazed snatched it away again, muttering something about confidentiality, but what we saw was: Rule #3: All Scratchwood Serfs shall ensure that they buy at least 37 drinks per week for their Duchesse. Rule #7: On greeting their Duchesse, all Scratchwood Serfs shall bow or curtsey, and be prepared to kiss whatever part of her body their Duchesse profers for that purpose. Rule #13: All Scratchwood Serfs must be prepared to give backrubs to their Duchesse on demand. The document finished with a dire warning: "Failure to follow these Rules and Regulations may result in disciplinary actions and/or expulsion from the Duchy of Scratchwood." Hmm... we've heard about Hazed's disciplinary actions... **>> THE FEDTERM LIBRARY Occy is continuing to upload some excellent sound files for you to use with FedTerm. They are general noises for you to set up as you like - not keyed to any particular thing in the game. They are well worth downloading. He's also provided a new compressor that works very well with sound files. Cauliflour has drawn a very good picture of himself for you to key to his name, or description, or whatever you want! Bella has provided an enhanced version of the .GIF to .FDP conversion program. As well as converting a GIF file to FedTerm's own format, this program lets you look at a FedTerm picture - just use a .fdp filename when you start the program. Here's a complete list of the new files in the library: 43 ARJ230.EXE (Occy) Good compressor for sound files 44 BART.ARJ (Occy) Sound - Bart Simpson (obviously) 45 BJUICE.ARJ (Occy) Sound - Beetlejuice saying "It's showtime" 46 BOMBBAY.ARJ (Occy) Sound - Bomb bay doors opening 47 CLUNKPEO.ARJ (Occy) Sound - Foghorn chicken 48 DEVIL.ARJ (Occy) Sound - Beetlejuice dancing with the devil 49 DROPIT.ARJ (Occy) Sound - Robocop saying "drop it" 50 FANFAIRE.ARJ (Occy) Sound - Basic fanfare 51 FOGHORN.ARJ (Occy) Sound - Another Foghorn 52 GLITCH.ARJ (Occy) Sound - Someone says "It's just a glitch" 53 HAHA.ARJ (Occy) Sound - A good hardy laugh 54 HOGAN1.ARJ (Occy) Sound - Tune from Hogan's Heros 56 IMNOTBAD.ARJ (Occy) Sound - Jessica Rabbit says "I am not bad" 57 IMTHERAB.ARJ (Occy) Sound - Bugs Bunny says "I am the rabbit" 58 IRONMAID.ARJ (Occy) Sound - Bill and Ted Iron Maiden 59 CAULI.ZIP (Cauliflour) Small pic of Cauliflour 60 GIF2FED.ZIP (Bella) Enhanced .gif to .fdp converter We should also apologise - last week we stated that the Teamster file had been uploaded by Rezrov, which was totally wrong! It was uploaded by Bochiman. Sorry! **>> THE FAN-CLUB We've been reliably informed that Freya has a fan-club, the members of which read the news avidly each week looking for reference to their object of devotion. Apparently, when they find record of her exploits they read the paragraphs aloud to each other, then print them out and place them upon a noticeboard for all to marvel at. Far be it from us to fail to please our readers, but this week we have been completely unable to find -*any*- stories of Freya's doings, salacious or otherwise! We apologise for this appalling lack, and will do our best to remedy it in future issues of the Federation News Bulletin. **>> THE SLEAZE-DROID REPORTS On the romance front: Jade and Destiny have announced their engagement, as Destiny callously casts off his every _amour_ of the Free Weekend, "permanent" or otherwise. Noe and Joyrider are due to be married Saturday morning, and have asked Tao to preside... presuming he can peel himself away from contemplation of the Infinite that early in the day. The plot thickens... the marriage between Tyiez and Menace has, following the pattern of their relationship, been on the rocks, off them again, on again, and is as of right now off again. Part of the strain no doubt comes from her pregnancy. Happy news to one and all... if you ignore the fact that it might be DTM's and it might not. Dr. Topper, the OB/GYN of record, has nothing to say for the record, but we predict some measure of bloodshed if the ultrasound picks up pointy ears, indicative of a certain elf's parentage. Mouths are hushed, and we doubt those wicked rumors of a couple of secret meetings between Tyiez and Altasren are true anyway. Honest we do. Quite a weird event the other night. Giskard went out of his way to meet with a lady named - of all things - Castrator, in a certain place safe from prying eyes. They both retired from Fedspace sometime later; Giskard without comment, Castrator cackling "I got it! I got it! Ahaha!" If you can figure out what this means, or even want to *try*, this correspondant doesn't want to eat lunch with you, any time soon. **>> SPYNET REVIEW Looking at all the lower level promotions, we are still experiencing an influx of new players. Welcome to all of you! This week's new Captains are Enhancer, Ralion, Sparky, Sheba, Buggersloth, Zhasaar, Drizzt, Zenon, Skypirate, Trojan and Daized. The following were promoted to Adventurer: Enhancer, Reginald, Sparky, Zhasaar, Zenon and Daized. Zara, Dunsel and Akiko all became Traders. Trania and Spongy both reached the rank of Merchant, and bought themselves companies: Moonstone, Inc. and Spongys Leather Goods, respectively. Ixtix also became a CEO, of Ixtix Ixtremes, Inc. Ixtix solved the awesome JP puzzle. Well done! Tether made it to Explorer, and has started work on his planet. Silversteel and Khan are now Thanes, with the promotion of their planets to Mining level. **>> CONTACTS The following information will appear at the end of every News Bulletin, so you don't have to read it if you already know it. In the event of a problem or question, you can: * talk to Hazed or Bella in the game * leave a message in the game log * a message to Hazed or Bella * send GEnie mail with the Federation Feedback option from the main menu FedTerm, the multimedia front-end program for the game, can be downloaded from the Federation library (option 6 on the main menu). You can order a copy of the unexpurgated printed Idiot's Guide to Federation by typing ORDER at any GEnie menu. Cost - a mere $12.95. (New edition will be available shortly!) Federation has several categories in the new MPGames RT. To get there, type M1045,1 from any menu prompt and SET category 13 (for information, instructions, questions and answers) or 14 (for general chat and discussions). The Federation Leader in the bulletin board is Krell (Mail ID: K.HILLYER). There are also private categories for Explorers, run by Krell, and for the Conclave run by Oddball (Mail ID: D.STALZLE). The MPGames RT also has a Federation library in the files area, Library 5. Library 18 holds the Federation News Archives. **>> BULLETIN ENDS