AOL NEWS YEARBOOK
Earthdate October 1996


Highlights from the month's news compiled by the demi-Goddess Hazed.


THE MONTH IN BRIEF

This month, the news switched its publication day from Saturday to Sunday.

Federation became part of AOL's new Members Choice scheme, which meant it was in the Top 50 products on the system. Yowza!

The Federation TechDroid sprang into life after months of seeming inactivity and implemented a series of changes to Fed. In fact, he hadn't been idle at all, he'd been working on a major change to the game's data structure preparatory to making the game multi-lingual, and now it was time to actually put the code in and see if it worked. See below for details of the new languages in Fed.

The GM puzzle was removed as a promotion mechanism and replaced with a company-profit requirement. Other changes were made to jobs which affected just about all ranks. See stories below for full details.

The MOOD command went away (bringing to an end that favorite news item, MOOD OF THE WEEK) and so did the ability to buy special drinks for people. Both these changes were announced as temporary.

A bug in the new version meant that everyone's bank balance was enormously inflated, showing them to be the proud owner of two gigagroats. Except that when they all tried to spend the groats before the mistake could be discovered by the TechDroid (Merchants frantically issuing shares, traders buying warehouses and filling them with goodies, everyone patronizing the stat shops on Earth, POs starting builds, and so on) they found that they didn't really have that much money, it was simply the display that was wrong.

Halloween was celebrated as usual with a costume contest, a planet called Pumpkin and a chance to burn the demi-Goddess Hazed at the stake. Hot stuff!


FED FOR FURRINERS

Although work still proceeds on translating the enormous amount of game data into French and German, the mechanism was put into the game for players to specify the language they wanted to use. As well as changing the game language, this also determines the way numbers are displayed, and how times and dates are given. The command to make this change is <LOCALE>.

<LOCALE name>, where "name" is French, German, American, or English, will change to that locale. At the time of writing this Yearbook, there is no German language text in the game, but if you switch to French locale you will see that Chez Diesel has been translated, and so has the newbod's tour of the Solar System.


PUZZLE SNERTS AND CHEATS

Puzzles in multi-player games are always problems. As soon as someone solves a puzzle, they just want to go and tell their friends how to do it.

The GM puzzle has problems from both ends. On the one hand, we have players who don't want to take any time to solve the puzzle, so just get someone else to tell them the answer, or worse, use a puzzle-solving macro. On the other hand, the puzzle snerts who delight in sabotaging puzzle attempts just end up annoying everyone, even those that want to solve the puzzle on their own merits.

So, since its obvious that as a promotion mechanism the GM puzzle does not work, we're changing the requirement for you to promote to GM. You won't have to do the puzzle any more. Instead, you'll have to run your factories well enough to make an even bigger profit than you needed to make it to JP. You'll have to have a profit of 32 megagroats (32,000,000 IG) in one cycle.

The GM puzzle itself will stay in the game, so people who are genuinely interested in trying to solve it, in exploring new areas of the game, and in the challenge the puzzle poses, can still take on their assignment. They just won't get a promotion at the end of it. Later, we'll put some kind of reward in for successful puzzle-solvers - a medal that will put letters after their name, perhaps.


CHANGE TO PLANET JOBS

Jobs generated by a planet and put on the workboard - either by use of the OFFER JOB command, or by milkrun slots - are being changed so that Transportation Central will not deliver them if no player wants to take them. Instead, the goods will be returned to the exchange.


TRADERS SHOULD BE TRADING

Low-ranking players often complain that there are no good jobs on the workboard. One of the reasons for the job shortage is that traders, instead of buying and selling goods on the trading exchanges and making nice profits that way, are continuing to do jobs.

It beats us why anyone would want to continue to do jobs when they don't have to, anyway!

Still, this is not what traders should be doing. The Fed ranks are grouped into bands and each time you cross into a new band it means you start doing something completely different to earn your money. Traders should not continue to do jobs, they should be trading. The profits are much, much greater once you know what you're doing!

To make sure Traders do learn to trade, we're disabling the ACCEPT command for the ranks Trader to Explorer. So you won't have any choice.


NEW JOB NOTIFICATIONS

New players start receiving notifications of jobs available as soon as they promote to Commander. This has sometimes been a problem by causing screen scroll, making it hard for them to figure out what's going on.

To cut down on the scroll, Commanders will now only receive notification from Transportation Central of jobs they can actually do - in other words, they won't see the details of any jobs larger than 75 tons, nor will they see out-of-Sol jobs generated by planets or factories. They will still see the full range of jobs when they type WORK to look at the workboard.

This change only affects Commanders. When you promote to Captain, the notification reverts to showing you everything.


RICH PEOPLE JOBS CAPPED

The OFFER command has been changed so that the payment you offer is given in groats per ton, rather than the payment for the whole job. This makes it consistent with all other jobs.

You might think this will lead to mistakes, with Rich People forgetting and offering Poor People jobs with astronomically large payments per ton... but it won't, because there is now a cap on the payment you can offer. Jobs that pay more than 30 IG/ton will not be allowed. There is no minimum payment so long as the payment is not zero groats!

All jobs that are put on the workboard by planet milkruns, directly by the owner, or by factory pipelines, have the same upper limit of 30 IG/ton; they also have a lower limit of 10 IG/ton.


SMILING AND FROWNING

Players are always requesting new features be added to Fed, some of them very significant changes that would take a great deal of work.

Then there are the little, unimportant, trivial requests...

One such is that when a say message ends with a frowny :( people should see you frown, just like they do when you use a smiley :). A new version of the game will go in on Tuesday that will do just that! It will also deal with winkies ;) in the same way.

Also, people who type in SAY messages all in capital letters will be seen to shout, or bellow, or yell. Sadly, this won't apply to COM messages... at least, not yet...


NEW FED FONT

You will notice that we are using a new font in the Fed window. The new font is a different version of Courier and it is clearer and easier to read - as well as allowing different characters to be used (see the TM symbol when you start Fed).

You may find the new font makes your Fed text bigger, or smaller, than you are used to. This is because the new font takes account of your AOL text size preference; the old one didn't. You may want to play around with the different sizes until you find one you like.

To change your text size, select Preferences from the Members window, then click on General, and choose between Small, Medium or Large.


FEDERATION PIN-UP CALENDAR

The featured picture above the month of October in the Federation 1996 Pin-Up Calendar is none other than the mischievous little FireImp!

This awkward-looking imp sits atop a giant mushroom, surveying the room before him. He brandishes a tiny pitchfork, that actually looks like nothing more than a glorified piece of cutlery. FireImp is about average size for an imp, which means he is quite short!

Tiny flames dance about FireImp's body, which looks pretty normal provided you ignore the pair of atrophied wings on his back. The cute little horns atop his head usually pass unnoticed due to a covering of thick, dark hair with red highlights. Of course, it is impossible to ignore the smoky aroma that envelopes the little demonspawn, which some think is his most endearing quality.

Since he is clad in only the skimpiest of briefs, you would expect him to be surrounded by such large throngs of adoring fans that FireImp would have to use his pitchfork to keep them at bay. However, he is handicapped by the fact that he is only three years old. FireImp tries to downplay this and says 'I'm just looking for a woman who likes to curl up and gaze into a warm, cozy fire on a cold night.'


PUZZLE SNERT'S PROPERTY LAWS

1. If I like it, it's mine.
2. If it's in my hand, it's mine.
3. If I can take it from you, it's mine.
4. If I had it a little while ago, it's mine.
5. If it's mine, it must never appear to be yours in any way.
6. If I'm doing or building something, all the pieces are mine.
7. If it looks just like mine, it's mine.
8. If I saw it first, it's mine.
9. If you are playing with something and you put it down, it automatically becomes mine.
10. If it's broken, it's yours. (No, the pieces are probably still mine.)


NEW BOOK SPARKS PROTESTS

The publishing house of Witness & Associates has stirred up controversy with the release of a new cookbook entitled 'Harrowing Halloween Dishes'. The book has offended some by the inclusion of several authentic Caterite recipes. The Caterites, of course, consider human flesh to be a delicacy.

Adventurer Goulash with dumplings, Squire Flambe, Broiled Thane in a white wine sauce, Commander Cakes, and fresh-roasted GroundHog are some of the special meals that are described. Sales have been brisk throughout most of the galaxy, but within Sol the books haven't moved from the shelves. A grassroots movement calling itself the 'International Council Against Cannibalism' is lobbying for sanctions against Witness & Associates, claiming that the next holiday cookbook they are preparing (due out in December) will be titled 'Cannibalistic Christmas Cuisine'.

In their defense, representatives of the publisher point out that all of the recipes have directions for alternate vegetarian preparations. Apparently, the vegetarian versions taste almost the same as the real thing if you smother them with enough teriyaki sauce.


GENERAL STRIKE FIZZLES

Ming's anti-riot divisions were out in full force on Friday, but the chaos and mayhem that were predicted when several planetary overlords declared a strike failed to materialize.

It is estimated that approximately 50 planets participated in the strike against Ming, in an effort to focus public attention on recent bureaucratic changes enacted by the emperor. Strikers set up picket lines around several planets, effectively closing down the links to between those planets and the rest of the galaxy.

Strike organizers had predicted major chaos, but it seems that there was only minor local disruptions. It was originally thought that the strike would hit traders and factory owners hard, and that they would then take their frustrations out on haulers and other lower-ranking Fedizens. However, the prevailing reaction to the strike seems to be indifference. Frankel Dumotz, a daily commuter, says, "The space-lanes were amazingly clear today - hardly any traffic. If this is because of the strike, well, then I hope they strike every day!".

Unfortunately, there was some violence on the picket lines. Spaceships passing the link to Opall were pelted with meteorites and small comets. A courier trying to get to Tigger was dragged from his ship by picketers and severely beaten. He was whisked away to the hospital and is recovering in stable condition. Several demonstrators were run over at the link to Albion when an overzealous commuter unsuccessfully tried to force his way through the picket lines. None of the injured strikers was seriously hurt and they were treated at the scene.


ARRANGED MARRIAGE CAUSES HAVOC

People were sent running and screaming from the Galactic Files Office this week when papers of intention were filed announcing an arranged marriage. Although it was a bit of a curiosity, since the arranged marriage is between two people who haven't yet been born, this is not what had frightened people. It was the participants in the marriage that gave everyone who found out about it the shivers.

Deor and NickDan141 officially pledged their offspring to marriage with the child of Phoenix846 and MousE4Ever. All four future parents signed the document and are looking forward to seeing their progeny wedded at some future date. Rumor is that they are so excited that they have already picked a name for the first grandchild: DangerMouse.


MILLENNIAL FEVER

As the end of the millennium approaches, the number of adherents to millennial cults have swelled. Ichabod Hov is leader of one of the largest such sects. He has declared that the inordinate number of rips in the fabric of reality that have been occurring are a sign that the end of the world will soon be upon us.

After one of these recent tears in reality Ichabod Hov announced on channel 5 that a merchant had fallen in to the rift and that '...the universe has come to an end!' Ichabod Hov quickly retracted this when reality soon returned to normal, but he contends that the end is not far off.

Ichabod Hov issued a statement saying that 'the incidence of these reality-rips is increasing. The tapestry of the world is unraveling and the fabric is fraying. Events all around us indicate that we are heading towards impending doom, and Ming's scientists are hiding this evidence from us! The only way to save yourselves is to put yourselves under my protection. Sign all your assets over to me and I will provide for you, now and for all eternity.'


MOODS OF THE MONTH

Its My Beam and I'll Spy if I wanna Pockets55 has just moved south.

Scrawled on the wall is a message: HAL9064 has just left the room.


QUOTES OF THE MONTH

Your comms unit relays a message from AlexHoltz, 'Hey I just figure if you can't get anywhere socializing then turn to a life of hard fruitless labor! LOL!'.

Your comms unit relays a message from JamHarwich, 'What planet is Titan on?'.

Your comms unit relays a message from ETHALE, "where is castillo on mars?".


BULLETIN ENDS


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